to anonymous , you know who you are

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  a cleverly constructed selfie  requiring quick skills of adaptation if i do say so myself 

     There will be no names and everyone is anonymous as any writer does to protect his sources. I am also not meaning to single any one person out but instead cover a multitude of helpful suggestions as to how to improve my performance as a writer. Again what about me shouldn’t be an open book, including criticisms of my personal life based on what I have written?  Apparently I have a tendency of putting a little too much of myself out there at least enough to be able to formulate an opinion on how desperate I am in my personal life , and why I am the way I am.

      Now if I wasn’t writing this I would at this point grab another cup of coffee and light up an illegal substance and sit back and enjoy a good read, but this is about me, and my writing and comes not only from one source over the years now ( 3 years since I have started my blog) , but from multiple sources, and oh yeah I am writing this so I need to keep my mind free and fingers moving as I recall all the events precipitating this blog today.

      I enjoy comment and don’t want to stifle anyone’s dreams of putting me in my place and telling me just like it is. To think your quoted words would suddenly appear on here is like dumping on you, because I can’t take criticism. Not about to do that. But instead will objectively try to interpret just how they were able to come to that conclusion and how it affects my writing. Need to try and understand in order to become a better writer to know just where I am going wrong.

     One of the biggest complaints I had was my atrocious spelling and grammatical errors including typo’s and capitalization, and comma usage, or lack of it as it may be. Granted those are all valid suggestions I have listened to and understand their significance as well I have learned to compromise in those areas and now do most of my writing and editing in my word program. It’s not perfect, has a loose nut behind the keyboard directing its actions , but overall you have to admit my writing makes a hell of a lot more sense than when I started. Could use an editor, but still I would be tasked with making it mine in the long run so since this is all free, I need to work conservatively and do it myself. This part is about as good as it gets for now. For your information when actually writing I type as fast as my mind moves to formulate the words and sometimes the mistakes are so bad I can hardly decipher myself when editing. But I just let it flow as I write and worry about the little stuff later.

    I always try to include a relevant pic or picture of topic of my discussion for the day. Some pics are the discussion meaning I choose to discuss the pic and why there was a story invoked by its presence. So far I have heard little about the pics or pictures that hasn’t been good or lacked relevance in some ways. In actuality I have included pics, specific to a person I knew who was reading this to incite a response , and sometimes it has worked giving more meaning to the stories I have wrote. Whether it had the same effect on all the readers is doubtful as they probably didn’t realize the significance of why I picked that certain pic. Over all I believe the pic kind of sets the tone for the story I am trying to tell to some degree. And takes me back to the early children’s stories and how the illustrations had a lot to do with developing my imagination. It still does when I see picture or an illustration I draw conclusions and formulate opinions on what it must be like sitting on a beach in Acapulco under a palm tree. I am there now pounding on my lap top as the warm summer breezes wash over me. Just as easily as sitting here I can run away to someplace exotic, why because I someone showed me a longtime ago just how to let go and imagine. I have been everywhere and nowhere, imagination, the poor man’s Expedia.com.

    This part of my writing (choosing the pic) I have no intention to change as it sets the mood for my stories and helps you understand what I am trying to tell you or show you. I would like to use more of my illustrations but find it hard to find the time to sit down and draw them out, then scan and it all has to be done fast as daily I have tried to write. So not only do I have to draw but write and edit the story. I still have a lot of stories to tell but trying to paint a mental image of what I experienced is hard to do on short notice. I should have been doing this all my life. My only regret is that I didn’t start writing earlier, but then again I wouldn’t have been living the stories I write sometimes. Kind of a catch 22. You can’t do both at the same time.  

    I try to include a piece of me in each story. Luckily I am six foot four and weigh more than is necessary and have plenty to share as apparently I have gone too far in this direction. In fact I have shared more than just on here as I am also on a personal site or was until today as I intend to change that also.

      I tell you my feelings like for guns, politicians, war, crime, and a variety of controversial subjects, all the while trying to understand people are entitled to their rights to not agree with me all the while. I accept this and I also understand this is my blog and I have a right to make it mine by carefully choosing what and when I share certain things to make it mine.

     To say the least anonymous is a fickle person , sometimes encouraging and at other times writing scathing mental reports as to my condition at the present time based on my writing , either on here or on my personal site or maybe it is from talking to them on a personal level they have come to know me better than myself . At times telling me they enjoy reading my blog daily and at other times being able to draw conclusions as to my moral character or even who I should be in a relationship with. Others are telling me to avoid relationships altogether as they say it will affect that raw edgy quality of my writing that I have.

     One of the conclusions I have heard is that I am a weak person and dependent on having a person in my life to make me whole, and that I scare women in particular. Wow is all I can say. Didn’t realize I was putting myself out there that much.

       To anonymous I have to say that is your opinion and I am glad I have influenced you enough to right all my wrongs in my life. I kinda have a different opinion why I share personal things with you the reader, sometimes it is to show I am human and have feelings.

    I guess my writing is important to people more so than I thought. Getting wrapped up in my personal life I am sure has eased the load on yours and like I said I have big shoulders and surely could take the load for you. I accept whole heartedly your interference in my life knowing at least you are reading me.                   

       Criticism is a double edged sword and I can take it to the heart and quit writing, or I can forge ahead as I am going to do. Letting my words pave the way for places I haven’t been. I have listened and I have heard all you say and every time I type a word I think of you the readers and of course trying to please anonymous, as if I ever could. Still I encourage you to criticize, to say the least, it all helps if nothing else but to tighten that loose nut behind the keyboard. Knowing what works and what scares the hell out of me allows parameters to be set in what I allow on here from now on.  Thank you anonymous for somehow sanitizing my blog.  I am going to persevere in my writing as well as in my artistic abilities if nothing else but to satisfy my own desire to understand myself as well. Unlike anonymous I still have a lot of conclusions about how this will all end. The only thing I know for sure is that it will.