Sunday, December 14, 2014

wouldn't try any of this today.

Days of Old





      Think I will spend some time writing about my life in Wooster area and some of the characters I met there. One friend of mine lacy  Crisco as that was his name, he was one of the finer people I know from that area , a short man and usually the really short guys don’t like hanging around guys like me, and really as far as friends , I mean really good friends go. He was the type you could wake up in the middle of the night, and say “Hey guy I have this body and need to get rid of it, any ideas?” Lacy would know what to do, and where to go so it would never be found. He was that kind of guy, and then goes to his death before rather than utter a word. I never had to test him but I just knew he was my go to guy.
      As  friends like we were, we would talk about our home life , fishing , getting drunk, which I did a lot of back then, and generally just cutting up at work or about anything our hearts desired and never once would we have a bad opinion but more a sarcastic camaraderie between us . We both worked at Halliburton, as well, we both worked at Scumburger but never on the same crew, the bosses seemed to know better. It seems we had too much fun together always laughing, never being serious, and the oilfield wanted you miserable like them so you were not allowed to have a good time, but we did anyhow.
      Another fact I forgot to share was that we both had the same birthday date, and weird as it gets lacy had blue eyes as fiery as mine sometimes, and a twinkle in them let me know we were about to be up to no good, like the day we took the new pickup painted Scumburger blue, with only 5 miles on it to pick up some auto parts for the trucks, which by the end of the day we had totally forgot. We started forgetting when we picked up a 12 pack and headed to the Shreve Swamp which was under water from a swollen summer rain over flowing the creek, the road coming into the swamp and the low lands was under about a foot of water as we drove the new ford truck out into the water, on what we hoped was the road . I drove the brand spanking new truck till the water was floating the beer bottles around on the floorboard of the truck, and by now we were deep in the swamp at least a quarter mile from dry land.  I stopped the truck and shut off the engine and we decided to hop in the back of the truck bed. We opened the doors and a few bottles escaped but as we stood on the floorboard leaning out of the truck and transferred ourselves into the bed of the truck by swinging around and avoiding stepping down and getting wet. We proceeded to set up the lawn chairs we brought and party down.
        We sat and drank and smoked a couple of bowls of some really rope dope and at times we would talk and laugh, and at other times we would just sit and listen to the water lapping at the tailgate and washing through the floorboards until the absurdity of what we were doing would wash over us like all the lost water around us and we would laugh for no reason. We thought if only the Scumburger engineers could see us now. Their brand new truck in the middle of this now lake and us sitting in the back drinking and smoking.  Surely there would be questions as to what happened to us, but we will just laugh it off, because our jobs sucked working for Scumburger and they needed us, besides who would train all the newbie engineers from Houston with the blue Ford LTD’s. We finished that 12 pack way to easy and decided to head back into town and grab another. The water was rising where we were sitting, as suddenly we could see the beer cans floating around in the back of the truck where they had not done that before, as we leaned back in our lawn chairs our feet on the side of the truck bed to keep our feet dry,  and thought that maybe we had better just get out while the getting was good.  So I backed up real slow in the same direction trying to not cause too many waves to drown the engine. The brand new blue ford Scumburger truck never missed a beat or slipped and soon I was backing up out of the water, when we were in the dry, we opened the pickup doors up and out rolled the water and beer cans we had in the cab. We grabbed those back up and tossed them in the bed of the truck and decided we had as much fun in the truck as we could possibly have, and had initiated the new blue Ford into Scumburger fold . I remember at one point while still in the water I smashed a beer bottle against the bed and christened it the SS. Scumburger, out on its maiden voyage.
         By this time lacy and I were rolling on the ground laughing so hard at watching the water roll out of that new pickup, and we thanked Henry Ford for being cheap as it didn’t have carpet in there. Besides being wet in appearance you would have never knew where we were that day. Our sides hurt so bad from laughing that we decided we had better quit while we were ahead. Nothing hurt, so we went back to the shop and threw the beer cans in the dumpster, and parked the truck in the garage and punched out on the time clock , oh yes we were getting paid to drink and smoke . Why should we go on our own dime?
         We headed home and partied some more but we both had to be into work early the next day , and when I came in first I noticed old Claude Denton the friend of mine who was later killed that I had talked of before, but he did such a particular thing as I watched him as he climbs out of his car and heads over to the edge of parking lot to a drop off and stares out over the expanse and doesn’t say anything, I said to him ‘How you doing Claude’, he snaps back to attention as if in a daze, and says ‘Oh I am fine’,  and we start talking about the day before and what happened to us as we never came back till everyone had left. I said we stopped and had dinner and avoided the shop for a while. As I am saying this I am walking past the pickup in the shop and I notice now a brown water line that wasn’t evident when we parked it last night, had dried and became apparent as it looked to be even up past the floorboards and above the floor of the pickup bed. I never said anymore but instead grabbed the keys to the cab over truck, we regularly use in the oilfields,  and proceeded to pull it out, and wash it with a steam jenny knocking the mud off of it from the job a couple of days ago, and was supposed to be done the day before till we were sidetracked. I did a quick spray of it and then pulled the new pickup out and hit the bottom of it taking the bathtub ring off the bottom of it when Lacy pulls in to work. We hastily get our stories straight and laugh about the bath tub ring and I mentioned to Lacy about how I had seen Claude get out of his car and do this ritual of looking down over the hill.
      Lacy proceeds to tell me that Claude had told him there was a pot plant growing over the bank apparently when we cleaned out our ashtrays and dumped them over the edge of the bank we had seed in there and a plant was growing and it was 6 feet tall but someone had just recently topped it.  He said Claude told him in confidence and didn’t want me to know because I would steal it. He was right.
     Claude even went as far as to call the sheriff, and they came out and assured them it was pot but they were not going to take it, instead they told them that Scumburger had better burn it, before some kid got ahold of it and left. They didn’t even bother taking it. I thought at first it may be a trap and so I didn’t do anything at all for a couple of days. Lacy and I never did hear anymore about the pickup or even being gone that afternoon but someone did complain that it seemed strange the new pickup lost that new car smell pretty quick and in fact smelled a little musty. We laughed it off to the fact that maybe the person who said that smelled himself, as we knew he needed a few more showers than he was getting. Kinda like the pot calling the kettle black.
      Anyhow this pot growing at our shop, really had my attention and I would check it out without getting to close to it, as everyday now I would see Claude pull in and get out and inspect his pot plant. I was always early just to watch him from the shop when he wasn’t looking. Finally I made plans with a friend of mine, to take it one night after I came in from a late job. I called from the truck as I was heading into town on our mobile phone and then met him in the parking lot and we had a tree saw we absconded from another friend and within a minute and a half, even with a car driving by, and us ducking out of site, that soon we had it in the trunk. We took it home and hung it to dry and partied down, but not long as I needed to hit the hay and be up early in the morn to watch old Claude when he came into work. Claude shows up and gets out of his car and as he is walking I notice him kinda fall back in disbelief and shock like old man Sanford having the big one in Sanford and Son as he leaned up against the front of his car.
      I come out of the shop and head to my car to get anything at that point and say to him
      “What’s the matter Claude?” He looks at me in this awful expression of disbelief and says to me.
      “Someone stole my pot plant,” real loud. I tried not to laugh at the hysterical nature of it. Yes I was bad to steal the guy’s pot plant but heck he was never going to smoke it and he was just leaving it there to get stolen, so he could have the reaction he was having now. A bit dramatic but he was from West Virginia and sometimes those guys exaggerate their feelings a bit. Claude was no virgin at this.
       I kept my composure and said, “You mean you were holding out on me shame on you Claude. I thought you were my friend. “
       He says “It wasn’t for me , I swear,” as he goes on , “I just noticed it growing one day and I have been watching it for over four months, day after day, it is the first thing I would see or look at when I climbed out of the car.”
        I said, “Wow Claude that’s too bad.”
        Then he goes on and asks, “You didn’t see it there?”
         I said, ”No Claude,” telling a little white lie, and then going on myself,” I wasn’t really looking or expecting one to be growing there , it is kinda out in the open Claude. If you are going to grow it I suggest you move it a little closer to the trees.” He assures me it wasn’t him that grew it and at that he told the story of calling the sheriff and what they did. I suggested that maybe it was them that stole it, I mean after all everyone is smoking now a days.
        Clade says,”Well I never.” I asked him if he wanted a joint to ease his pain as I really felt kinda sorry for him. At this Claude laughed and we walked down and looked around at the stump that was about 3 inches wide. I picked up a couple of leaves that fell off the night before and gave them to Claude and said here Claude you may need this. He laughed and threw the pot leaves down and headed into the garage. Lacy had come in and was drinking coffee in the break room, he had seen us out there and knew what had happened before Claude even opened his mouth.

      He was about to crack up when Claude says to him” You will never guess what happened lacy, someone stole my pot plant.”  And soon everyone in the shop was laughing and joking about the pot plant growing at Scumburger. Not everything at Scumburger was blue we did have splashes of green here and there if only for a short time. I know I shouldn’t have taken that pot plant as it wasn’t mine to take, and so therefore by telling the story now I absolve myself, and I am making amends,  and I am truly sorry that Claude never had a chance to experience the pot for himself, because not more than 2 weeks later he was killed working when a piece of manifold pipe steel exploded and knocked him off the derrick killing him. I will never forget the vision of him standing there looking down over that hill searching for his pot, Bless him,  I am sorry Claude you are not hear to read this now.  

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